at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
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