ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
