I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
