it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
