Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize