yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
