what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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