she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
