It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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