try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
