girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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