No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
birth control should be required to get into college
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
