May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
