He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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