Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
