I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
