Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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