He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
