So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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