Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Randomize
