Ambien. No doubt about it.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
