He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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