I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
