I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize