Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize