meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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