i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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