please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
