So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
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