i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
