garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
