this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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