i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
