i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
