yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
