lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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