Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
