Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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