Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
