Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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