Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
