I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
