is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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