Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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