Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize