that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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