he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
