I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
