help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
