so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
