my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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