I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize